Nickolas Summa: LGBT Americans deserve federal nondiscrimination protection

As an LGBT-affirming marriage and family therapist in Westmoreland County, I see many people who lack any access to important resources and care. It’s disheartening to know that so many people don’t get the support they need due to discrimination in the place I call home.

When I came out in my teens, I had no one to talk to about LGBT issues. I was raised Catholic, and for some members of my family and community, I was worried that their faith could make it difficult to accept that I was gay. So the subject was left pretty much untouched.

My mom and close relatives were somewhat accepting, but would often remind me not to tell my grandparents. It felt very isolating and gave me a sense of shame, and the impression that something was wrong with me.

That experience led me to want to be the person I needed when I was young, eventually leading me to become a therapist. Growing up LGBT in Westmoreland can be difficult; it’s a pretty conservative place. I wanted to be someone who could support that younger version of myself, to tell him it was OK. We’re raised to love our neighbors, and that should mean loving all of them.

When I started graduate school at Seton Hill University in Greensburg, I was a little worried that my program would be conservative. To my surprise, the school used a multicultural, social justice approach. From the beginning, we talked about race, sexuality and gender. The program reflected the Catholic value of serving others, and had a refreshing emphasis on embracing diversity and encouraging advocacy. The commitment to serve all people was inspiring.

When I graduated, I knew I wanted to come back to Westmoreland to help people like me in the community. I’ve had an extremely positive response to my private practice. I didn’t have to do much advertising, just made clear on my website that I am LGBT-affirming.

The phones were ringing off the hook. I got teens and people in their early 20s. I got parents of kids who were exploring their identity. I got people who had been closeted their entire lives. They all just needed a space to share, to be their true selves.

I’ve long been an advocate for a nondiscrimination law in Pennsylvania. I remain surprised by the number of people who don’t realize that there are no statewide protections for LGBT people in our state.

There are actually 29 states, including Pennsylvania, that lack comprehensive statewide laws explicitly prohibiting discrimination against LGBT people. While 21 states and over 350 cities, like Pittsburgh, have passed LGBT nondiscrimination protections, this patchwork of protections is unsustainable and leaves too many people behind. Everyone should be free to live their daily lives without fear.

This is one of the many reasons we need a federal LGBT nondiscrimination law. For my clients, protections would lift some of the weight of worrying. Just being seen as an equal under the law means something. To be seen as someone who deserves equal treatment and equal rights, to be valued enough to be just as important as other Americans.

When marriage equality passed, it was great to know we had that option. But I still feel people staring when I’m walking with my partner down the street. It’s become normal for us to avoid physical contact in public. I see my straight family members sharing their lives in ways that are uncomfortable for me. So many aspects of daily life are worrisome and unfair for LGBT people in a state, and country, without nondiscrimination protections.

I grew up in Westmoreland County. My family is here. I love seeing that things are slowly improving. But for LGBT people and their families — the wait has been too long. I’m doing my part to make a difference for my community. It’s time for Congress to do its part.

Sen. Pat Toomey has said he’s retiring in 2022. I hope he will use his remaining time in office to support federal LGBT nondiscrimination protections. It’s going to take a bipartisan effort to pass clear, comprehensive and secure nondiscrimination protections for LGBT Americans in all 50 states.

Nickolas Summa is a licensed marriage and family therapist who lives and works in Irwin.