Letter to the editor: Shut up and enjoy your $600

I got a message from Congress the other day. Funny that it was a coded message and needed a bit of decoding skill to translate. Here’s what my message said: “We are excited to inform you that at nearly midnight on the last day of our 2020 session, we were able to throw together a patchwork, half-baked aid bill that shows our great dedication to serving our constituents.”

It continued, “the effort it took to do all this for you was monumental.

“After all, it’s not like we normally fulfill our constitutional duty and pass laws that benefit the average citizen.

“We usually prefer to cater to the giant corporations, multinational banks, special interests, lobbyists and our large donors.

“Furthermore, we have known for many years now that effective laws and following the constitutional process aren’t necessary, since you are satisfied being ruled over by random rules and edicts made by bureaucrats.

“LAWS. Where we’re headed, we don’t need laws.

“Finally, though you may think this moment of generosity, a result of our ‘coming together,’ may be excessive, remember: We still prefer division over unity. We need you to keep fighting among yourselves, be sure to keep voting for us, and don’t read the bill carefully.

“Just shut up, enjoy your $600, and we’ll see you again in six months.”

Tim Kaczmarek

Natrona Heights